Chicago

April 8, 2008 - The final eight show, right before Idol Gives back, is "Inspiration week." The idea is that each singer picks a song that will be an inspiration to others.

Michael Johns - Dream On: Two-first-names is up first with the Aerosmith song Dream On. Now, Dream On is one of my favorite songs, one in a long list of songs I like that Michael Johns has sung. However, I was frankly bored by the performance. MJ essentially sang the same arrangement as Aerosmith, and well, I've already got the .mp3. Plus, Aerosmith hit's the high notes properly. Randy's critique was spot on, their were pitchy parts and it just didn't do a lot for me as a listener. Paula's chihauhaus loved it, and Simon was blase.

Syesha Mercado - I Believe: Syesha continues to gain ground on the field as far as I'm concerned. Her pick was "I Believe," apparently a Fantasia Barrino song. Like most of the songs Syesha has picked, I don't particularly care for the song, but she seems to sing it well enough.

Jason Castro - Somewhere over the Rainbow: Jason said arrangement was by some Hawaiian guy with a ukulele... but it sounded pretty similar to a recording I have of the song by Rufus Wainwright. All three judges liked it... and so did I. Oh, and by the way, dreadlocks is using the same eyelash groomer as Clay Aiken.

Kristy Lee Cook - Anyway: Er... it wasn't bad, in fact Simon & Paula seemed to like it, but I'll side with Randy... I just kept thinking, I'll bet Martina McBride sings it so much better.

David Cook - Innocent: The performance was just weird. That isn't to say it was bad, but I wouldn't really say it was good either. Of course, I'm still not a big David Cook fan, but he seems to be original and versatile. Randy wasn't sure. Paula loves him, and Simon thought it was pompous. Oh, and the white jacket... was that a strait jacket? And in the shameless pandering category, we have the message "give back" written on his palm... OMG! He's like so thoughtful!

Carly Smithson - The Show must Go On: The problem remains, she's boring. Even Paula didn't like it... and Simon falls back on the 'well, you look good.'

David Archuleta - Angels: Highschool heart-throb takes the stage behind an enormous grand piano. As normal, it's a heartfelt ballad, and I just know he's going to win the show on demographics, even though I don't think I'd ever buy an album or a single. His voice just doesn't do it for me... gasp...

Brooke White - You've got a Friend: When I first saw that Brooke would be playing the James Taylor folksong, I immediately knew she'd be on a stool, alone on stage, singing a wonderful song with her wonderful voice. And then it didn't happen. Someone else was playing the piano, there were several violins... and she just sang it too slowly for my taste. I felt like she had issues syncing up with the music, but Simon said it best. "It was a pleasant walk in the past."

My vote for the week? Jason Castro. Other permissible votes? Brooke White, David Archuleta, Syesha Mercado, and Michael Johns.

Please go home already: Kristy Lee Cook, Carly Smithson.

Let's see here. My early favorite, Michael Johns is gone, but Mariah Carey is mentoring our last seven.

David Archuleta - When You Believe
He's very star struck and tells Mariah he - gasp - listens to her - gasp - all the time. The song was boring, but decently sung. Simon tells him he would have bet a million that David chose When You Believe.

Carly Smithson - Without You
Generally when a chick sings that she can't live with you, you think that's a good thing... er not. Carly can go on living without me... and the ending just proves that Carly doesn't have a big enough voice to sing a power song... and Simon agrees with me.

Syesha Mercado - Vanishing
Like the rest of these songs, I haven't heard Vanishing before... but Syesha seems to get the song and is singing the heck out of it. She's got the big voice for these songs that Carly doesn't.

Brooke White - Hero
Brooke, on stage, just the piano and her voice. This isn't the greatest song ever, nor is it particularly suited to her voice, but I still want to go see Brooke in concert. Randy liked everything but the bridge... Brooke needs to learn not to interrupt the judges... and Simon thinks it was like ordering a hamburger and only getting the bun... Randy and Paula are assuring Simon the meat was in the bun. You can't make this stuff up. Randy says there was no mustard or mayonaise though.

Kristy Lee Cook - Forever
Mariah Carey says Kristy Lee sings this better than Mariah... um we'll see, but the opening notes aren't so promising, and the rest of the song is very plain vanilla. As the camera pans to show the crowd, even the crazies near the stage don't know how to react to the song. Simon says it was whiny.

David Cook - Always be my baby In the session with Mariah, I think David's going to try and channel Eddie Vedder with this one, and he starts the song that way. Then about 30 seconds in, it's like he takes a back seat to the music and there's some guy on stage singing along with the band... and then he just starts shouting... baby... Gurrgg, that was not something I want to hear on the radio. Simon starts to label it Karaoke hell, but he's referring to the others and not David Cook. I vote that this one is included in Karaoke hell.

Jason Castro - I don't wanna Cry
Then don't. I've often thought I would like Jason Castro a bit more if he was a little less geared toward winning the hearts of high school girls, and more Jack Johnsonish... he was tonight and it was good. Randy couldn't see past the drum-circle get-up on stage and didn't like it, but Paula and Simon both did.

Votes best to worse: Brooke White, Jason Castro, Syesha Mercado, David Archuleta, David Cook, Carly Smithson, Kristy Lee Cook.

DirectTv Episode Description:
Don Geiss decides to name Jack his successor as the chairman of GE, but a shocking turn of events involving Geiss' health jeopardizes Jack's promotion; Tracy thinks his career embarrasses his son.
First aired: April 23, 2008 on NBC

To begin, this is an excellent episode. Don Geiss tells Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin) that he will be the new GE Chairman, but Jack has to keep it a secret until the board meeting in three days. Jack can only tell his successor, so he tells Liz Lemon (Tina Fey). He promotes her to an executive (she initially refuses until he shows her a slip of paper with her new salary... she slaps him, but eventually 'pioneered the button classic campaign.')

At the same time, Tracy Jordan brings his son's flute to school and realizes his son neglected to invite him to 'bring your father to school day,' likely because he is embarrassed. (Tracy ends up dancing topless in front of his son's class.) So, feeling like a bad dad, Tracy decides he's going to do something to make his son proud of him. After seconds of thought, Tracy decides to combine his two passions in life (Video games and pornography) to make the never before done porn video game. Frank (Judah Frielander) tells him it cannot be done because of the uncanny valley (Frank pulls out a chart to explain:

Frank Rossitano: "as artificial representations of humans become more and more realistic, they reach a point where they stop being endearing and become creepy"
Tracy Jordan: "Tell it to me in Star Wars."
SNIP
Tracy Jordan:
"I was born to design a video game where characters get with each other for golden points. My genius will not be denied!

Anyhow, as Tracy (and Kenneth (Jack McBrayer)) work on the porn video game, Devon Banks (Will Arnett) attempts to hi-jack the GE chairmanship. Remember, despite being gay, Devon is marrying Don Geiss' daughter. Eventually, the episode ends with Don Geiss in a diabetic coma, and his daughter, who is totally dependent on Banks as chairman.

Best Quotes
• "The head of the stressball division hanged himself." - Jack Donaghy
• "You get one cry in life... you've chosen well." - Don Geiss
• "Uggh, Hugging, it's so ethnic." - Jack Donaghy
• "Suck it Monkeys, I'm goin' Corporate!" - Liz Lemon

Finally, Chris Parnell makes another hillarious appearance as Dr. Leo Spaceman. The scene with the slow mo running to save Don Geiss is hillarious. It involves a montage with the Star Wars soundtrack, Spaceman in a brown cape, Frank losing control because of Tracy's superior porn affinity, and Tracy finishing his video game too fast for Kenneth.

Chuckles: - 12
Belly laughs: - 1 (a little lower than normal)
By the Hammer of Thor's - a dissapointing 0, but one hilarious "Ah Blurg!"

Direct TVGuide: A model in an office-supply catalog makes Michael feel things; to win back Dunder-Mifflin's parking spaces, Kevin and Andy oppose bosses of five businesses...
Originally Aired: April 17, 2008

After the disastrous dinner party, Michael gets a crush on the girl in the office-supply catalog, and then announces it to the office (in case they were going to try and set him up with one of their friends.) When no one has an immediate suggestion, Michael makes it mandatory that everyone give him a name on an index card within the hour, or they are fired.

Kevin gives him the name "Wendy." When Michael calls, it's the fast food restaurant. He ends up ordering a meal and sends Dwight to pick it up. Seeking to seal the deal, Dwight calls the catalog, leading to the funniest part of the show.

Dwight (on phone): That is fantastic! Thank you. Thank you very much. This is just what I needed. (Hangs up phone, turns to camera.) The furniture company gave me the name of the advertising agency. They gave me the name of the photographer. The photographer, a spaniard, used a Wilkesbury modeling agency. The agency gave me the following information: Deborah S 142 S. Windsor Lane. Dead. Car Accident. Case Closed.
Michael: She's dead?
Dwight: (drags finger across his throat, making a cutting noise)
Michael: But she's so young.
Dwight: She was so young, but now she is dead. As dead as every dead animal who has ever died.
Michael (reacts in agony): Gawd.
Stanley rolls his eyes.
Dwight: (Whispering) Why don't you sit down Michael... come on... here we go.
Jim: Michael, you didn't even know her.
Michael: Try not to be so hurtful, Jim. Please. Not at a time like this.

Because she feels so bad for Michael, Pam gives him her landlady's name. Michael goes to meet her at Starbucks and tries to dodge the date because the landlady isn't as pretty as the girl ordering coffee in front of him. They end up talking, hitting it off pretty well, but Michael's very rude and they part ways.

When Michael returns to the office, he is mad with Pam because she thought to set him up with someone who wasn't good for a passionate affair. Jim walks over and tells Pam that she should realize that her landlady's going to kick her out. Pam replies that she'll have to move in with her boyfriend. Jim is agreeable to this, but then Pam says very seriously that she will only move in if she's engaged. Jim, without missing a beat, says that it's coming. Later, he shows an engagement ring to the camera that he claims he bought a week after they started dating.

The show closes with Jim and Pam walking back to their cars. The sun is setting. The lights are hitting a tree in full fall splendor, and Jim drops to one knee. Watchers scream at the TV, and Jim says "Hey Pam... will you wait for me one second while I tie my shoe?"

Chuckles/Cringes: 8
Belly Laughs: 1
"That's what she said": 0

DirectTv Episode Description:
Floyd, Liz's ex-boyfriend, needs a place to stay overnight after his flight is canceled; Jack is demoted to the 12th floor, causing him to question his future with the company.
First aired: May 1, 2008 on NBC

This was a marvelous episode of the funniest show on television. For a comprehensive and complete recap of the episode, check out IMDB.

Basic Recap: Don Geiss (Rip Torn) is still in a diabetic coma, and Kathy Geiss, Don's idiotic daughter, is the CEO. Of course, Devon Banks (Kathy Geiss' homosexual husband) is pulling the strings, and so Jack (Alec Baldwin) has been reassigned to the twelfth floor.

In the writer's room, it is Sandwich day, and I'll let Frank (Judah Frielander) explain it to you:

Frank: "What's that? You've never heard of Sandwich day? Why, it's the most wonderful day of all! Once a year the teamsters go to this italian sandwich shop in brooklyn. No one knows what it's called or where it is. It's a teamster's secret, but they buy us these sandiwches. Oh! Such sandwiches! And the dipping sauce. Oh Joy! God bless us everyone!"

Meanwhile, Floyd (Jason Sudeikis), Liz Lemon's (Tina Fey) old boyfriend who moved to Cleveland, is back in town and has asked if he can 'crash' at Liz's place. Liz is still angry because another woman answered the phone when she called Floyd eight months ago, but Liz still loves Floyd, so she decides to prove to Floyd what he's missing. (There's a hilarious scene that involves Liz, a spotlight, a fan, a tight red dress, and Floyd.)

The funniest exchange of the episode occurs as Jack is cleaning out his office to move to the twelfth floor. Kathy Geiss is the new resident, and she has moved in with her stuffed animals and unicorn paintings.

Jack: Well, I wish you the very best with the office, Kathy. By the way, you know who hates unicorns? ... Mark Wahlberg. Jack picks up a picture of Wahlberg off her desk.

Jonathan (Maulik Pancholy), formerly Jack's Assistant: Kathy Geiss's office... please hold. Jack pauses at hearing Jonathan answer the phone. He's betrayed. Jonathan rushes over to Jack. Jonathan's whining throughout the scene. Mr. Donaghy, you're not really going down to twelve are you?

Jack: I have to. Of course it's humiliating. Banks is trying to shame me into leaving, but where else am I going to go? I've been sleeping with the Cindy Crawford of corporations for the last twenty two years. What am I supposed to do? Just lie down with some skank like 3M?

Jonathan: What about Washington. I'm sure your friends in the Bush administration...

Jack:Laughing... Bush, has it gotten that bad? Good God, I'd rather work for an American car company than jump on that sinking ship.

Jonathan: I made you this. He holds up a poster with pictures of Jack and himself. The top clearly says Friends 4 EVA!!!

Above Picture courtesy of: Video Gum

Jack: Uh no. No, no, you didn't.

Jonathan: Singing the Sarah McLaughlan song... weakly I will gremember you. Will you remember me? dubey do... dubey do... don't let your life pass you by.

The scene above was absolutely hilarious. I almost rolled off my couch while I was watching. Anyhow, after this, Liz hangs out with Floyd and they have a great time, but Floyd has to go catch his flight. But Floyd can't seem to get out of New York as his airline has declared bankruptcy. (They still pop popcorn, but there's no more airplanes.) So Floyd returns to Liz's apartment, and she confronts him about the girl who answered his phone. Floyd (who has already told Liz that his phone's battery died) pulls out his phone and announces he's got a flight and they'll have the conversation later. Later happens when Liz is jogging through Central park (singing 'Bitch' by Meredith Brooks) and she sees Floyd sitting on a bench reading the paper. He admits to lieing to Liz because he didn't want to have the conversation and has no idea who answered the phone eight months ago.

Back in the writer's room, the writers are scrambling to get Liz another sandwich, because they ate her sandwich earlier. When a contingent goes to ask the Teamsters for another sandwich, they learn that they have to participate in a drinking contest in order to get another sandwich. (It's in their contract, according to Jack.)

The episode ends with Liz and Floyd reconciling at the airport, all the writers and Teamsters singing Danny Boy, and an announcement on MSNBC.

Television: MSNBC has learned that former GE executive Jack Donaghy has joined the Bush administrations as the Homeland security director of crisis and weather management

Great Quotes:
Jack Donaghy: "I'm losing it Don. I mean, I've been walking the streets in this crazy snow trying to figure out who I am, where I fit in. I even stopped to catch a snowflake with my tongue, but evidently that's some sort of signal in Chelsea."

Liz Lemon: You used Ghostbusters for evil!

Kenneth: "Alcohol? This smells just like Hill People milk. I've been drinking this since I was a baby!"

Chuckles: 9
Full throated belly laughs: 2
By the Hammer of Thor(s): a disappointing 0.

Torben Review Episode gets 4 stars out of 5, "30 Rock" is 5 stars out of 5.